UNEDITED FROM: 16/03/20
Well, here we are. High Scruff checking infor a bit of a negotiated writing session. Sober Scruff let me come out on the conditions I did the chores set out. Writing just so happened to be one of them. So here we are, sitting in my room, and starting to really get a feel for the keyboard. Trying to remember the joys of writing, always. Work to get it out of the work category. It does feel good though, that’s the weird thing, it’s just starting anything while you are high is always more daungting than what the task is. It feels like chore. Anyway, trying to change that!
Is me doing this writing a form of confidence or arrogance? Where is the line? Is someone expressing themselves annoying? Is it annoying because there is an element of arrogance attached to it? If you are putting your ideaas out there, you no doubt have at least some intricate desire that we can’t dodge to be heard, and your opinion to be ‘approved’. But then those who don’t are also in a snese, a coward. But there are also those who don’t come arcoss arrogant, or for the most part (we all have lapses, if they didn’t then we wouldn’t believe they were human) these people are somehow revered. What is it? Confidence. People love confident people. That is genuinely confident people. Is an confident man who has integrated his ego? Integrated his shadow? Not in your face? A Good listener? Speaks his truth? Maybe those are some separation points between the two. Fuck maybe that is it. But what if those people are actually just arrogant behind closed doors? You never know! Is it that every confident person is arrogant in nature, but they manage to keep it out of sight. They are ‘playing’ the confident man. They know what people think is arrogant. In which case, I should ask them about this question! Haha maybe though.
Do people miss the mark because they are not arrogant enough? Maybe those who are inherently selfless struggle with confidence too. Maybe they are constantly trying to please the other that they forget to please themselves. Maybe the truly selfless person simultaneously sacrfices a confident lifestyle due to their lacking in arrogance. Does arrogance give you the means to be confident? I don’t think this to be true, but maybe. It feels like the truly selfless person (if that truly exists, and I have my suspesions) could still weild a sword. In loyalty? For sure. For them self? I think so still.
Ok Microsoft word is glitching so ah, yeah. It was fun, when your on the thought path it is great, but when you release there is no such thing, you loose your swing.
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